


A Rousing Game of "What Did You Give Me This Time"

by Dusty_Forgotten



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe- No Supernatural, Humor, M/M, Multi, Open Relationships, Sexually Transmitted Diseases
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-11
Updated: 2015-11-11
Packaged: 2018-05-01 01:52:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 189
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5187641
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dusty_Forgotten/pseuds/Dusty_Forgotten
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>One-sided relationships are hard. Open relationships are hard. One-sided open relationships are doubly hard.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Rousing Game of "What Did You Give Me This Time"

**Author's Note:**

> Did you know most STIs are curable? All mentioned here are.

Every time Castiel requests an STI screening, the nurse eyes his wedding ring. He’s faithful, but still gets tested every six months, because although his partner’s faithful, he’s not monogamous.

Besides, Castiel would never see his mother-in-law if it weren’t for their November bet.

“Results are in!” Crowley calls as he hands Cas his half of the mail. “My vote’s on gonorrhea.”

“Chlamydia has a high rate of recurrence.” Cas replies as his partner sweeps a letter opener through his envelope.

“Is that your final answer?”

He gives a curt nod as Crowley unfolds the paper. “Drumroll... Sorry, angel. My mother’s spending Yule alone.

“Why do you hate that woman?”

“Why don’t _you?_ ”

Castiel sighs. “So, the Bahamas this year?”

“I wish. Trichomoniasis!”

He narrows his eyes, taking the offered letter opener. “That’s odd. Trichomoniasis is usually asymptomatic.”

“Mine is. What’s eating _you_?”

Cas glances over his own lab report. “...I have a urinary tract infection.”

Crowley cackles, and his significant other glares. “Don’t pretend your bacteria are superior. You still have to spend Christmas with my family.”

“Yes, but you _also_ have to spend Christmas with your family!”


End file.
